So I decided I needed a break. I’d take it easy for a week. Read a novel. Take afternoon naps. Enjoy leisurely strolls down the road. Really rest up.
By Sunday evening, I was depressed beyond words.
Turns out that my mind can only take so much perfection. Then I ache for a problem to solve. A kitchen to clean. A fly to swat.
Not to give the impression that the rest didn’t do me good. But even a rest needs to end. There comes a point when “rest” becomes the newest line on the to-do list…except nothing gets done.
The real rest occurred during the first half of the week when I was seriously tired and needed it. Then the naps, the novel, the change of pace, and even the strolls allowed me to breathe deeply again.
But as the week wore on, the rest wore thin. By the weekend, I was wondering why I existed at all. I stood firmly by as laundry piled up, dishes accumulated in the sink, words did not get written, stories knocked around my brain, and my soul doubted its existence.
God flourished though. He rested and waited, and probably tapped His foot as I went from weary to relaxed to woeful.
My experience as a human being is summed up in the word—unpredictable. The moment I imagine the perfect scene is the moment that the scene won’t measure up in reality. God can imagine a leaf and make it quiver with life. I imagine anything and I stop seeing what really is. I stop being present. Alive to what grows and goes all around me.
The beauty of fiction is that it is fiction. I don’t actually expect Luxonian aliens to quarrel about the value of the human race with Ingots or Crestas. The fictional world is only a picture of what is real. A painting of a leaf. Not the leaf itself.
Rest is like that. Real rest is a deep imbibing of reality. Allowing the body to slow to a gentler pace, the heart to beat with a quieter rhythm. It is not dead space. It does not push the universe and all of life aside. On the contrary, it pays deeper attention to what is. God’s reality. The created world. The breath of life. Love.
The fast pace world of to-do-lists, chores, got-to-get-it-done-or-the-world-will-end anxieties, are really far less real than the “real” of rest time. And that’s why it is so hard to stay there. Because, in a way, it forces us to re-orientate our souls toward what is real and important. And that is awesome. But exhausting.
Then we need a break from resting, and we get back to work. To our imaginary reality. Our to-do-lists and our work related priorities.
So, the dishes are done, the floor has been swept, the laundry is in the dryer, I finished a story, and I’ll start dinner in a bit.
Life is good. Glad I got a rest. Now I’ll take it easy and get back to work.
Novels by A. K. Frailey
Last of Her Kind http://amzn.to/2y1HJvg
Newearth: Justine Awakens http://amzn.to/2pq0vWN
Melchior—Vengeance Is Mine http://amzn.to/2taeW2r
Historical Fiction & Science Fiction Blend
OldEarth ARAM Encounter https://amzn.to/2KLhlsN
OldEarth Ishtar Encounter https://amzn.to/2OAkDQF
OldEarth Neb Encounter (In production)
OldEarth Georgios Encounter (In production)
The Adventures of Tally-Ho http://amzn.to/2sLfcI5
The Road Goes Ever On—A Christian Journey Through The Lord of the Rings http://amzn.to/2lWBd00